Mishap in Isle 4.....

I found myself in the grocery store last night standing in front of the hamburger helper section with a blank look on my face because my head hurt and I was tired and I did not want to make dinner. Of course this is where two people I know found me (why not in front of the gourmet baking isle??).  The first person who noticed me is not someone I know well or have even seen recently. I couldn't even remember her name but I was pretty sure I knew where I knew her from.  She jumped right into a nice long discussion about what she had been up to and her preparations for Christmas. Thinking she was one of the mothers from scouts I asked her if she had been to the tree lot yet (we are all taking turns volunteering there to raise money). The questioning look on her face made me realize I obviously didn't know her from scouts.  I quickly re-worded my question into a very generic one - something like " Have you gotten a tree yet?" while my mind raced to place her. Finally she made a reference to football (her son played on the same team as my son. There it is!).  The conversation went pretty seamlessly from there. Ugh but that was frustrating and I felt like a fool for not fully remembering her.  I wonder how obvious it was that I couldn't place her? Probably pretty obvious. An actual light most likely went off behind my eyes giving me away.  I know there have been times when I have talked to someone and I know she did not remember who I was.  I know there have been times when I have had no clue who someone is and I'm pretty sure I pulled it off too.  There's been times when I've just had to flat out ask, "who are you?" I feel like if someone has bothered to remember who I am I should be able to give them the same courtesy. Thank goodness the second person who came upon me was someone I know fairly well so my aching brain did not have to repeat the whole process. Though, on the other hand, the first woman saw me greet the other person and probably noticed the difference between that and how I greeted her...............ugh, my head hurts again..............   
                   So, what is the protocol when someone you vaguely remember starts talking to you like you are old friends?

Not the only broken light bulb.......

We set up the Christmas tree last night.  We got the thing standing and all plugged in and noticed that half a strand of lights were out. Anyone who has ever been in this situation knows that this means we have to go bulb by bulb to find out which one is out.  I get this brilliant idea that Hubby and I should each start on an end and work our way towards each other. So we sit down around the tree, each with a new bulb in hand and get to work. 
          We'd been sitting there for about five minutes when Hubby says from behind the tree, "Is your bulb in?".
          I tell him no and start to move on (5,4,3,2,1 and - ) "Oh My Gosh!!!" I gasp
          
          We could have past it if one of us had our bulb out while the other was trying the new one! How could we (yes, we. It was my idea but he went along with it gosh darn it!) not have thought of that??  Hubby decides we should just carry on but this time (I hate when he is smarter than me) we should make sure all bulbs are in at the same time. 
           So we continue on, testing each light, circling the tree on our butts when I hear him again from the other side, "Well, we are stupid. We should have just taken a glance at everything first." 
           "What? Why?" I'm afraid to hear the answer......
           "Because it's pretty obvious which one it out," He informs me. "This bulb is blown; completely shattered. Look." He hands me the broken little light. Yup, that would have been pretty noticeable if we had looked for it. 
            Stupid, stupid, stupid.  All I can say in our defense is.............ah..................ugh. I have nothing. 

      

      We called the kids back and and finished decorating the tree. As I looked on at the beautiful (fully lit) tree I thought of one thing to be grateful for; Thank goodness the kids were all still little and distracted by a Christmas movie while we blundered through that. Could you imagine how different that scenario would have been if we'd had three teenagers looking on??? (shudder)

Baby's don't just cause big tummies....

My sister is pregnant with her first child. She is about four months along and barely showing. She came here to have Thanksgiving with us and my five year old daughter was very excited to see her pregnant Aunt.  A few days into the visit I'm in the bathroom with my daughter brushing hair and this is the conversation that we have.

Her: I'm so happy for Aunty
Me: Why's that?
Her: Because she hasn't gotten big yet. But soon her tummy is going to get really big.
Me: Yep, that's true
Her: And her hips will get big and her butt will get big and then she'll know it's time to have that baby.
Me: choking on laughter....
Her: Then I really hope she gets to go back to her normal size. - for her I hope that.
Me: Wait, what????
Her: (with a look like I should know this stuff) Some mommy's still have big tummy's and hips and butts even after they have babies. I know. I've seen them.
Me: Well, that's true but I think you are right, I think Aunty will go back to her original size. 

We've never talked about people's size before.  I knew she had probably noticed that some are larger than others (it is the age for it after all) but for her to put it like that just cracked me up! Big hips?? Geesh!

Entering the Divorce Stage of Life

                It seems that I have reached that age where friends are no longer getting married but rather getting divorced.  It makes me quite sad and also causes me to feel a little guilty for being so happily married myself. I am also finding that most phone calls with friends are only about their respective divorces and never about any of my news.  The amount of times I have been told recently that this is "just between you and me and don't tell ANYBODY" is astounding.  What I want to do is tell all these people to try to make it work, stick out this rough patch, don't give up! But I know that a) no one will listen and b) that might not even be the right answer. 
              With all these friends going through this right now I find that my own life is altering. Couples night is out. Suddenly, Hubby  gets nervous at the mention of girls night because my friends are now trying to meet guys. Calling a girlfriend to vent is no longer an option as I will end up not getting to speak a word while they sob on the other end.  I feel terrible for them, these housewives forced back out into the world they have forgotten about by men they trusted to take care of them.  It terrifies me a little bit too. Not all these women saw it coming. Some, in fact, were caught completely off guard. Like my girlfriend who asked her husband on Father's Day what he wanted as a gift and he said a divorce. I wonder if there is a divorce lurking in my future that I cannot yet see. I wonder if my time is coming when Hubby will drop this bomb on me.  I don't think my life is heading that direction even remotely, but then, I wouldn't have been the only one so fully fooled. 
              I know the statistics, I see the numbers. More than half of all marriages end in divorce. I guess it is just different when it is happening around you to people you know and not just a number in the news. Hubby and I have been close to divorce before but somehow we've always managed to drag our mangled bodies out of the war zone and patch things up. Honestly, I think we are better people for it; we are definitely closer for it.  I want to tell everyone that they too can make it work, but I'm not that naive.  Instead, I am a silent confidant for those who need one; there are no words I can speak that will help them through this. It is their own journey. Instead of offering worthless advice to greived friends I plant a longer kiss on Hubby as he walks in the door. I snuggle closer at night. I bite my tounge on little critiques. There is no reset on life. I only get one shot to make this marriage work.  I wish the best to all these people - to anyone having to go through this heartache.